Friendsgiving and Friends Giving

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls bloom.” ~ Marcel Proust

This week my daughters host their annual Friendsgiving celebration at our home!

I love listening to the hum of their voices talking and laughing. It’s been a little quiet around here this year as both girls and all their friends are away at college. So, I do love when they all come home. And although their friendships will change as they each start to go their own way; the ones who give consistent effort to stay connected will be able to pick up right where they left off every time they get together.

I think about the friends I have - acquaintances, colleagues, family, my spouse, my daughters’ friends’ parents, my workout friends, my long-distance friends, my closest friends, old friends, new friends, potential friends… and on and on. All different levels of friendship and yet all hold value and a place in my heart. Maybe you can relate, when you stop to think about the different levels of friendships you have as well. 

It’s important to have gratitude for all types of friendships. To recognize those who make us smile and bring joy into our lives, love into our hearts and truly (as our quote says today) make our souls bloom. And we must also keep in mind that in order to maintain those friendships, it takes effort. Of course, your level of effort isn’t always the same, just like your level of friendship isn’t always the same. But one thing is for sure, the level of effort you give to each other will correlate to the level of relationships you have.

Now you may not realize that to be true because if you are like me, most of your really close relationships might actually feel quite easy and natural. But odds are that it feels easy because there is a deep connection AND reciprocal effort given. There’s no drama or difficulty and there’s no keeping score. But when you really look at it, you probably give more effort to those deep relationships than you realize. You call or text regularly. Get together every chance you get. Check in or have quality time. You give of yourself, your time and your love. And it is that effort of giving that makes your friendship strong.

Some other friendships might not warrant you giving as much effort because they are a different level of friendship. And that is okay too. But just remember that the level of effort you give will most likely correlate with the level of friendship you have. Therefore, if you know someone that you’d like to have a greater friendship with, then it’s time to be a friend who’s giving.

So in honor of Friendsgiving, be grateful for the different levels of relationships you have. And ask yourself if there are any you would like to give more time, energy and effort to. Maybe it’s an old friendship you’d like to revive or a new one you’d like to see flourish. Then challenge yourself to begin practicing a spirit of giving to those relationships.

Here’s to Friendsgiving and friends giving! May you always have a multitude of friendships to be grateful for.  

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